Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Doctor Dilemma

My previous pregnancy was full of anxiety, especially in the third trimester, because I had placenta previa. In the end, I couldn't have found myself a more capable, compassionate OB to take care of me and my baby in the situation. Luckily, I was able to carry Sweet One the full 39 weeks which is designated (at least here, I have no idea about anywhere else) for a scheduled C-section.

The first appointment we had with this pregnancy, my OB told us how excited she was to see our name on her list of new pregnancies. It made me feel even happier that she was our doctor but unfortunately, I had no idea that she is ill. At our second appointment I ended up seeing a different doctor without any warning and later that afternoon I learned from my neighbors that my OB was ill. I left that conversation with a feeling that she would not be able to deliver this baby.

Monday afternoon I was outside with Sweet One and at 5:15 Big Love told me I had a phone call from the OB office that I had to return. Unfortunately he told me too late to call that day and so I spent the night with a strong feeling that my doctor would no longer be my doctor and that they stuck with me the only doctor in the office who I felt very uncomfortable with. My fears were confirmed the next morning. I immediately pleaded with the woman on the phone to not leave me with him but at this point she has asked me to see how I feel after my first appointment with him. I agreed.

Just when I finally stopped worrying about our green card, I get to worry about this now. I have spent the last two days trying to figure out a way to advocate for myself that is firm, gracious and successful in convincing whoever I need to that I do not in any way feel comfortable with this doctor. I do not know exactly what it is. When I met him with my first pregnancy I just had a feeling that I was so relieved he wasn't my doctor and then when he had to fill in for my OB and check on me after my C-section, I again was rubbed the wrong way. It may be a lack of bedside manner or the fact that he is male, perhaps even both, but I do not want to have him examine me at all. Nor do I want to be pretty much naked, paralyzed on an operating table with him cutting me open.

Will this office not give me an option and force me to stay with this doctor? I do not know. I guess I'm a little ignorant on what is considered acceptable in this situation. I fully understand that this is not the easiest situation to deal with for the office as much as myself but I desperately hope they will have a fraction of the compassion my previous OB had and let me have another doctor. What is consider acceptable/medically ethical in this situation?


  1. You have every right to refuse him as your doctor. Go with your gut. You don't have to have reasons, but you do need to have an OB with whom you are comfortable with. So sorry you lost your doctor. :(

  2. Thanks Meg! Sometimes I'm not sure what is acceptable since I haven't grown up in this health care system and it is nice to get your input. You're not the only one to say this so I'm starting to feel that more and more I can expect for them to move me and it not be a fight. Unfortunately, there is only one OB clinic in this town! Luckily, they have a great reputation.


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