It doesn't matter that from 2:00 on she's been rubbing her eyes and yawning, she doesn't seem to want to nap. I miss her third nap! It was the only time in the day where I grabbed my Diet Coke, sans caffeine, and did nothing and worried about even less.
Today I thought she'd take a third nap. We got home just before 3, I gave her a little boob, read a few books and then started trying to get her to nap. The writhing started immediately and after awhile I put her in her crib. I am now leaving her in there wondering if she will put herself to sleep. I have to admit that the laughing, panting (not quite the right word but don't have another one) and chatter is cute. (After 15 minutes in her crib it has turned into crying.) If she doesn't nap she'll have an earlier bed time which means we'll probably be waking up before 6 again and I hate that.
I feel so frustrated that I can not figure out her sleeping. Her naps are spaced out STUPIDLY with an average day being:
- out of bed anywhere between 6/6:30
- napping again at 8 for 1.5 hrs if I'm lucky
- napping again sometimes by 11:30 and rarely does it go longer than 1.5 hrs
- sleeping by 6:30/7
This leaves that last 5.5 hrs of her day for her to be very tired and I'm not sure what to do other than just trying to remain calm. I think the fact that it is Saturday with Big Love not back from work yet (he works 6 days a week and for some reason Saturday is by the far the hardest day for me emotionally but I'll post about that another time).
Big Love got home and as soon as he opened the door he was given two options: a) peel and cut up butternut squash or b) take his daughter for a walk. He opted for b) and now the only thing I can do is have a mini-meltdown and I don't know where the hell it is coming from.
Cheers to motherhood and the days our children can wear us down in a mere 45 minutes.